A Shrewdness of Apes

An Okie teacher banished to the Midwest. "Education is not the filling a bucket but the lighting of a fire."-- William Butler Yeats

Monday, May 22, 2006

Movie Madness Monday: Taking stock of our lives edition

It's time for Movie Madness Monday! Step right up and see if your taste in cinema is as arcane and bizarre as mine!

Here is the basic outline: each Monday I will pick a movie and sprinkle in a few of my favorite quotes. You then stop your damn lurking and contribute a quote of your own, from the same movie, if possible. I will not tell you the name of the movie until Wednesday. Now, you could cheat and type the quotes into a search engine, but I know where you live.

So as we face the end of another school year, let's reflect on our lives and go a little philosophical. Go!

"It's true what they say Oatman - you can never go home again, but I guess you can shop there."

“Hi, how are you? Yeah, I'm a pet psychiatrist, yeah. I sell couch insurance, uhm-hm, uhm-hm. And I test market positive thinking. And I lead a weekend men's group, we specialize in ritual killings.”

“Don't kill anybody for a few days, see what it feels like.”
“Alright, I'll give it a shot.”
“No, no, don't give it a shot! Don't shoot anything!”

“They all have husbands and wives and children and houses and dogs, and, you know, they've all made themselves a part of something and they can talk about what they do. What am I gonna say? ‘I killed the president of Paraguay with a fork. How've you been?’”

“I am at home with the me, I am rooted in the me who is on this adventure.”

“There's a contract out on your life. Believe me. I was hired to kill you, but I'm not going to do it. It's either because I'm in love with your daughter or because I have a newfound respect for life.”
“That punk is either in love with that guy's daughter or he has a newfound respect for life!”

“Do you really believe that there's some stored up conflict that exists between us? There is no us. We don't exist. So who do you wanna hit, man? It's not me. Now whaddya wanna do here, man?”

“Did you go to your reunion?”
“Yes, I did. It was as if everyone had swelled.”

****Wednesday Update: Come on back to the Old Oak Tree, Pointers, it's

A lovely little dark comedy with a set of brilliant performances by John Cusack, Joan Cusack, Dan Aykroyd, Jeremy Piven, and a violent little cameo by my favorite kickboxer, Benny "The Jet" Urquidez!

Note the cool music listed on this, the second half of the soundtrack. If you don't have both the soundtracks, and you listened to college radio in the 80s, you are missing quite a treat. The Pogues! Joe Strummer!

Here's Joan, in her "Sergeant Pepper" outfit:
"It's out of my hands, here, sir. The gods want you to go back home, and they want you to delete someone while you're there."

"Would you describe their position as inflexible?"

"Intractible, sir."

So thanks for playing! Keep those quotes coming, and spread the word to your friends to come play....


At 5/22/06, 9:19 AM, Blogger Mamacita (The REAL one) said...

That constitutes an emotional involvement, and it would be unethical for me to work with you under those circumstances.

At 5/22/06, 9:55 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

So far, I've seen two spooks and a ghoul.


At 5/22/06, 2:27 PM, Blogger World Geography Teacher said...

"Thousands of innocent people die every day. Detonate one rich guy's dog, and you're a marked man for life."

At 5/22/06, 3:19 PM, Blogger 100 Farmers said...

If I show up at your door, chances are you did something to bring me there.

This movie was such a great followup to all of the 80's John Hughes movies even though he didn't do it.

At 5/22/06, 3:49 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Everybody's coming back to take stock of their lives. You know what I say? Leave your livestock alone."

You can thank my 20-yr-old son for this one.
I think that's my plan from now on. Wait until he gets back from classes and ask him.
Will be hard next year when he's clean across the state...

At 5/22/06, 4:29 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love this movie's soundtrack. I knew most of the songs already, but "Let My Love Open The Door" has become a favorite.

At 5/22/06, 4:36 PM, Blogger "Ms. Cornelius" said...

Actually, did you know there are TWO soundtracks? That's how much good music there is in this thing.

At 5/22/06, 5:09 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

They really should have made a sequel to this movie this year. It would have been great.

"I'm a professional killer."
"Do you have to do post-graduate work for that?"

"You're a psychopath."
"No, no. Psychopaths kill for no reason. I kill for MONEY. It's a JOB. That didn't come out right."

"If you love something, set it free. If it comes back to you, it's...well...broken."

My ten-year reunion is this year, and I'm not going due to finances and the fact that so far it seems kind of a party for the "in-crowd" versus a get-together to see who's fat and who's bald. Thinking about this movie almost makes me wish I were going, but I don't think anyone from my class became a hitman or something interesting like that.

At 5/22/06, 7:03 PM, Blogger Smithie said...


This would be number fifteen for me FIFTEEEN! It's alarming how many of my former classmates are dead now or have 16 and 17 year old children. Small towns man.

At 5/23/06, 6:41 AM, Blogger "Ms. Cornelius" said...

I had heard they were going to do a sequel, but the rumors faded away.

Oh, well, we can dream, right?

At 5/23/06, 6:44 AM, Blogger "Ms. Cornelius" said...

"Pooch puncher! Hound Hitter! Rwooooo rwoo rwoo rwoo rwoo!!!!!"

At 5/23/06, 9:27 AM, Blogger graycie said...

You're upset about ten or fifteen years? Right now this very minute, people from my high school graduating class are nearing a resort hotel in California for our (get ready) FORTY-FIRST year reunion. And I'm not there because it is pretty much impossible to get away from public ed at this time of year (finances be damned). They'd better sip some very tall, very cold drinks with very silly umbrellas in them for those of us who can't be there. (You did hear me say FORTY ONE years didn't you?)

At 5/23/06, 10:42 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

32 years.
ak, ak, ak!!!

At 5/23/06, 2:30 PM, Blogger "Ms. Cornelius" said...


Okay that's not from the movie, but still...

And how dare they have a reunion and not wait until the summer!!

And I did go to my 20th. And it WAS as if everyone had swelled. Especially me.

(Well, one thing you can say, I have always had a problem with my weight. Useta not keep it on, now can't get it off even if I throw a stick and say fetch!)

Except for the former quiet girl who had obviously had LOTS of plastic surgery and whose dress looked it was made from fabric that someone in Sha Na Na would have worn. And no, that wasn't me: I was the smart-ass literary and music girl.

"Thanks for the pen."

"It looks like a DEMON'S resume!"

At 5/23/06, 8:14 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Heh. "Thanks for the pen." I yelled out "Lloyd" when I heard that line. People looked at me like I was nuts.

"I gave her my heart, and she gave me a pen."

At 5/24/06, 9:54 PM, Blogger "Ms. Cornelius" said...

Gee, mellowout, you really will "say anything," won't you?


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