What a relief that idiocy knows no bounds.

Apparently, there ARE stupid people everywhere, and some of them teach school (just like every other profession). From Australia:

An Australian teacher was reprimanded after giving students an assignment to plan an extremist attack designed to inflict maximum casualties, officials said Wednesday.

The Kalgoorlie-Boulder Community High School class in Western Australia were told to plot against "an unsuspecting Australian community", with the goal "to kill the most innocent civilians in order to get your message across".

The students, aged between 15 and 17, had to explain their choice of victim, location, time and weapon, as well as describe the effects their method would have on the human body.

The assignment, which was designed to test pupils' ability to apply what they had learned about terrorism in a society and environment lesson to "real life", was quickly withdrawn after an angry backlash from parents.

"It was certainly an inappropriate method of exploring the issue of conflict and had the potential to offend and disturb parents and impressionable students," said Western Australia state education minister Liz Constable.

Sharyn O'Neill, head of the state's education department, said it was "inappropriate, it was insensitive and rightly, people are upset".

She apologised to one family in particular with a girl in the class who had lost a relative in the 2002 bombings on the Indonesian resort island of Bali.

"We are very sorry for the pain and discomfort that this situation has caused," said O'Neill. "Certainly no ill was meant by this assessment task."

School principal Terry Martino said the teacher was "relatively inexperienced" and it was a "well-intentioned but misguided attempt to engage the students".

Wow. Really? It would have been such a better assessment of the lesson's goals to assign kids this: You are the new Home Secretary (or whatever Australians call an equivalent position). How specifically would you attempt to prevent a terrorist attack in _________ (name the nearest large city in Australia). Create a list of at least 5 concrete actions or programs that could be created to address specific situations discussed in class."

Tuesday Musing Open Thread 6: Gag me with a spoon

Okay, so today I was looking at a kid's paper and there was a long, crusty booger on it. I nonchalantly got it off with a kleenex while inwardly suppressing a heave. So.... I'm gonna go there.

For your consideration: what is one of the grossest things with which you have had to deal as a teacher? Let's try to walk the line without actually inducing any technicolor yawns. Remember, euphemisms are our FRIENDS.

Finding Middle Ground Near Hallowed Ground

The controversy over the construction of a Muslim cultural center and mosque two blocks from Ground Zero in New York City continues unabated after weeks of heated rhetoric. I saw on the news today that over 60% of New Yorkers oppose the construction of the center and mosque.

We should never condemn the members of an entire group based on the actions of the most extreme members of that group. This particularly applies to religions. Would those of you who are Christian want to be judged by the excesses of the Crusades, or the Irish Troubles, or the Sex Abuse crises currently rending so many denominations in two? I would imagine most definitely not. In the same way, no one should condemn all Muslims for the actions of the Taliban, Muammar Qaddafi, or al-Qaeda.

In America, we often condemn Muslim countries such as Iran or even Saudi Arabia for their lack of toleration for those of other faiths. We are proud of our commitment to freedom of religion. Well, situations like this are where our values truly get tested. We only have values if we stick to them even when it is difficult and uncomfortable. It's easy to claim the high road when that road is smooth and easy.

Muslims have the right to worship freely in America, and unless we want to allow extremists like those who attacked us on 9/11 to succeed in their campaign to destroy America and what it stands for, we must resist the impulse to retreat from that value.

Having said that, it would also be wonderful if our Muslim brethren would be sensitive to the very real pain and trauma that still lingers in the wake of these attacks. They don't need to be told that the world will never be the same again, since their lives were changed as well by the terrible events of that day. It would be a sensitive gesture to reconsider the location of a Muslim cultural center and mosque so close to a place that was, let's face it, attacked by people who claimed a fervent if misguided devotion to that religion.

I would like to humbly suggest that a Muslim cultural center doesn't HAVE to be built at that location, and the greatest examples of charity, kindness, and concern for others enshrined within the pages of the Qur'an could be demonstrated by a willingness to consider an alternative location. If the group promoting this project truly wishes to advance understanding about Islam to a still-traumatized America, perhaps it could consider relocating this project to somewhere less sensitive. Frankly, a Muslim cultural center and mosque on this location would not go very far in its goal of promoting understanding and friendship for millions of people-- the very people I am sure they hope to reach out to in goodwill.

Let's search for a middle ground near this hallowed ground.

Tuesday Musing Open Thread 5: Beginning of School nightmares

For your consideration: Some of us are so tightly wound that our work life invades even our sleep time. What are some school-related dreams or nightmares that you have had? Mine come back even before the start of the actual school year for extra special torture.

Place your responses in the comment section!

It gets earlier every year.

Show of hands: how many of you are back at school already? And if you feel like it, tell what state you are in and what the temperature currently is.

It feels like they turned down our A/C to try to make the case that a bond issue needs to be passed, since A/C is on the wish list. However, they supposedly fixed it the last time, and it sure doesn't feel cool right now. Maybe they didn't account for the hundreds of teen-aged bodies radiating at 98.6 degrees?

Tuesday Musing Open Thread 4: Suggestions for new teachers

For your consideration: What is the most valuable advice you could share with a new teacher in your building?

This time of year, there are thousands of people across the country who have been hired for a new teaching job. Now is the time for us to come to their aid! Put your comments in the comment section!

How to deal with failing schools: a continued conversation

Remember our discussion of failing schools and layoffs a few days ago?

Now listen to this idea from Boston, via the NY Times:

Earlier this year Massachusetts enacted a law that allowed districts to remove at least half the teachers and the principal at their lowest-performing schools. The school turnaround legislation aligned the state with the Obama administration’s Race to the Top program incentives and a chance to collect a piece of the $3.4 billion in federal grant money.

From Washington this makes abundant good sense, a way to galvanize rapid and substantial change in schools for children who need it most.

In practice, on the ground, it is messy for the people most necessary for turning a school around — the teachers — and not always fair.

Often the decisions about which teachers will stay and which will go are made by new principals who may be very good, but don’t know the old staff. “We had several good teachers asked to leave,” said Heather Gorman, a fourth-grade teacher who will be staying at Blackstone Elementary here, where 38 of 50 teachers were removed. “Including my sister who’s been a special-ed teacher 22 years.”

And while tenured teachers who were removed all eventually found positions at other Boston schools, it’s unsettling. “Very upsetting,” said Ms. Gorman. “A lot of nervousness for teachers.”

Blackstone’s new principal, Stephen Zrike, who made the decisions, agrees. “I’d say definitely good teachers were let go,” Mr. Zrike said, explaining that a lot of his decisions were driven by particular skills he wanted for teams he was assembling. “I wouldn’t doubt a lot will be excellent in other places.”

And how much to blame are teachers for the abysmal test scores at Orchard Gardens, a kindergarten-through-eighth-grade turnaround school here, that’s had six principals since opening seven years ago?

The goal of the turnaround legislation is to get the best teachers into the schools with the neediest children, but often, experienced teachers get worn down by waves and waves of change and are reluctant to try again.

“You fear being pulled by the latest whim,” said Ana Vaisenstein, who has taught in Boston for 12 years.

“Sometimes in education, there are so many changes being made at once, the important things get lost,” said Courtney Johnson, a five-year veteran.

Asked about applying to one of the city’s 12 turnaround schools, Lisa Goncalves, a first-grade teacher with seven years’ experience, said, “I’d be hesitant to go alone.”

And that is the simple idea behind a new program that is being used to staff three of the turnaround schools in Boston: you don’t go alone. Rather than have the principal fill the slots one by one, the Boston schools have enlisted the help of a nonprofit organization, Teach Plus, to assemble teams of experienced teachers who will make up a quarter of the staff of each turnaround school come fall.

“It’s like jump-starting a culture at these schools,” said Carol R. Johnson, Boston superintendent of schools. “In turnaround schools, you often wind up with a high portion of first- and second-year teachers, so you need some experience, a team of teachers who are enthusiastic and idealistic.”

Said Celine Coggins, the chief executive of Teach Plus, which developed the idea and is financed by the Gates Foundation: “I think teachers want to know they’re not going into a school alone as a hero.”

The teams will spend two weeks working together this summer. While teaching a full load, they will serve as team leaders for their grades and specialty areas like English immersion. They will work 210 days versus the normal 185 and get paid $6,000 extra a year.

On average they have eight years’ experience.

There were 142 applicants — from as far as Arizona, Florida and Nevada — for the 36 positions. Everyone offered a job took it. Sixty-eight percent came from Boston public schools, 18 percent from charter schools.

Their credentials are impressive. Ms. Vaisenstein, who will teach English immersion at Blackstone, has been in education 33 years, speaks Spanish and French, understands Portuguese and directed a Head Start program in Boston for five years. Lillian Pinet, an 18-year veteran, is fluent in Spanish and Amharic, an Ethiopian language, and teaches an education course at Boston College. Sylvia Yamamoto, who will teach third grade, is a 20-year veteran who taught English to foreign students at Harvard for years....

There's more at the link.

Now this plan shows some serious consideration about how to change the culture of a school. It is not enough to replace the teachers (and apparently keep a principal for more than a year at a time). You have to put in place a cadre of seasoned, EXPERIENCED veteran teachers-- and you have to do what you must to make them want to take on that challenge. The administration has to agree to listen to what that cadre of master teachers has to say.

This is dumb.

Milwaukee's teacher's union would rather have the district's insurance cover Viagra than make sure colleagues who are laid-off From the Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel:

The Milwaukee Teachers' Education Association has filed a civil suit claiming that MPS' exclusion of Viagra and other drugs that treat erectile dysfunction from its health insurance plans constitutes sexual discrimination against male employees.

Last September, an administrative law judge dismissed an earlier ruling that sided with the union, which filed an equal rights complaint in 2008. The state's Labor and Industry Review Commission upheld the decision in June.

The union now seeks a review of that decision by a Milwaukee County circuit court judge.

"This is an issue of discrimination, of equal rights for all our members," said Kristin Collett, spokeswoman for the Milwaukee Teachers' Education Association.

According to documents contained in the MTEA lawsuit filed last month:

MPS first agreed to cover drugs that treat erectile dysfunction in 2002. By 2004, there were 1,002 claims for such drugs from MPS employees. During negotiations with the union for its 2003-2005 contract, MPS tried to stop coverage of the drugs, citing rising costs. An arbitrator sided with the district in 2005.

In 2008, the teachers' union filed a charge with the state's Equal Rights Division, complaining that not offering the drug violated the Wisconsin Fair Employment Act.

"The exclusion of an FDA approved, medically necessary drug from an otherwise comprehensive pharmacy plan violates Wisconsin's prohibition on discrimination on the basis of sex," the union argued.

Lawyers for the union claimed that because treatment for female sexual dysfunction such as vaginal cream and estrogen replacement medication is covered, the removal of Viagra from the health plan unfairly disadvantaged male employees.

The school district has countered that the elimination was a cost-saving measure and non-discriminatory because the drugs are mainly recreational.

Setting aside both arguments, a judge and later the Labor and Industry Review Commission dismissed the suit, ruling that MTEA, by acting collectively for its members, did not offer proof that any specific individuals had experienced discrimination, and that the statute of limitations for discrimination suits had passed.

Collett said she was aware of at least one member who had formally complained about the lack of Viagra coverage, but that the MTEA was not seeking relief for an individual member. Rather, she said, it is seeking to stop a discriminatory policy for all members...

There's more if you care to read it at the link. Look, there are some things related to the pharma industry one may have to pay for themselves. I personally would rather that all "sexual enhancement" meds (for females or males) be on your own dime (since we can't seem to get real health care reform in this country) and instead see all autism treatment be covered, for instance, or family planning services. One is definitely more of a "quality of life" issue than the other.

I understand principles. But in a time of lay-offs, it's about another "p" word-- no not that one, you nasty minded things. The one I was thinking about is "priorities."

Tuesday Musing Open Thread 3: Qualifications for hiring administrators

For your consideration, and as an extension of last week's question: If you were given the chance to revamp the hiring process in your school, what would be the top qualifications you would look for in administrators being hired to fill open positions? How do these compare with the qualifications that are currently in use by your school district?

Of Back-to-School Sales and Personal Budgets

In my Sunday paper, there they were. The "Back-to-School" sales fliers.

After I wiped the tears out of my eyes, I realized how grateful I was that at least they hadn't put these out in early July. Then I ran across this tidbit. Please note the items I have boldfaced:

Fewer parents plan to cut their back-to-school budgets, but they will count on smartphones and social networking to find the best bargains during the second biggest shopping season of the year, according to a Deloitte survey released on Tuesday.

"Retailers may be encouraged that fewer consumers are planning to pare back this year, although they may find that shoppers continue to be deliberate in their purchases," said Alison Paul, Deloitte's retail sector leader in the United States.

In the online survey, 28 percent of 1,050 parents of school-age children said they were planning to spend more this year on back-to-school clothing and supplies, while 17 percent said they would spend less.

The survey showed that among households that expect to spend more, about 34 percent said their children needed more expensive items, such as computers, and more than 26 percent said school budget cuts meant parents needed to pay more for children's items.

Back-to-school shopping trails only Christmas for the amount of money consumers spend in a season.

The survey was conducted between July 9 and 11, and has a margin of error of plus or minus three percentage points.

This year, 58 percent of respondents said they would change the way they shop for back-to-school items by buying more items on sale or only items family members really needed.

Last year, 70 percent of the respondents said they expected to change the way they shopped because of the recession, down from 90 percent in 2008.

"The survey indicates that consumers' recession-induced behaviors are beginning to wane as households seek to replenish certain items and worry less about the economy," Paul said.

WHERE'S THE SALE?
Twenty-nine percent or 305 of the people surveyed said they planned to use mobile phones for price information, retailer advertisements and to find discounts and coupons.

An equal number of people said they would use social networking sites to find promotions, look at products, and read reviews and recommendations.

"Consumers are increasingly on the phone, online and on-the-go," said Paul, adding that retailers using mobile applications, text alerts and video content may win an increased share of shoppers' back-to-school budgets.

Discount stores were still the No. 1 shopping destination, with 89 percent of consumers surveyed saying they planned to shop at discount stores for back-to-school items.

According to the survey, 31 percent of consumers said they would shop at traditional department stores, up from 26 percent last year, and 23 percent cited specialty clothing stores, an increase of six percentage points over 2009.

After two consecutive years as the second most popular destination, dollar stores dropped to the third most popular destination behind office supply/technology stores.

Some of you may work at schools that are sending out those supply lists soon. As a parent, I have one serious request: please consider whether students will really need all of the items you have marked as "required" on those lists. If my family sometimes struggles to be able to afford all of the new things required at the start of the school year, imagine how other families who are led by parents either unemployed or underemployed are going to get by. If kids are going to use markers and scissors or, worse, a $100 calculator only once or twice a year, perhaps they really shouldn't be necessary (and those calculators bug me for a different reason, too).

As a teacher, I often see students whose families can't afford to buy loads of supplies. I try to buy pencils and spirals in bulk at these sales and store them in my room. I claim to have "found" them when distributing them to my needier students (and that IS true-- I "found" them on sale for a penny at Office-O-Rama).

I realize that schools have fobbed off ever more of their own budgetary problems on parents and students, but let's not be a part of the problem if we can help it.

Student sues counselor over college recommendation letter

Whoa. For those of us who teach high school, here's a reminder about how truly important those recommendation letters can be:

Shannon McCoy's collegiate future looked bright. As a swimmer with two state champion titles and a respectable 3.0 GPA at Lafayette High School, she received scholarship offers from several four-year institutions.

McCoy also received an award for the "highest standards of excellence that embody the Rockwood spirit" four times during her high school career.

But her plans were nearly scuttled by her own high school's guidance counselor, according to a lawsuit filed by her parents late last month.

Beth A. Brasel, the counselor, filled out a recommendation form addressed to Colorado State University describing McCoy as below average in five key areas - initiative, character, integrity, leadership and commitment to service.

The university pulled the scholarship, although it was later reinstated.

Mary McCoy, Shannon's mother, said the family has filed the suit in order to figure out what exactly went on in school's guidance counseling department.

"The reason we're pursuing this civil suit is because there are things we don't know what happened or why," she said.

Kim Kranston, chief communications officer of Rockwood school district, declined to comment, saying the district has not yet been served with the suit.

According to the suit:

Brasel had never met McCoy when she filled out the form.

After receiving the news of the rejection from Colorado State in March, McCoy found herself in a bind.

She had already turned down swimming scholarships from several other universities, including University of Nebraska and the University of North Carolina, after she signed an NCAA National Letter of Intent to accept the scholarship at Colorado State University in November 2009.

All the scholarships offered were based on McCoy's resume as a high school swimmer.

In addition to winning two state championships, the St. Louis Post-Dispatch named McCoy to its all-metro swimming team four times, twice to the first team. Lafayette High School also awarded McCoy Lancer Student Athlete awards three out of her four years at the school.

When McCoy signed the letter of intent, Colorado State University's athletic department issued a press release announcing McCoy's intent to swim for their university.

After receiving the news from Colorado State, McCoy and her parents spent three months unsuccessfully trying to find a suitable substitute.

A resolution finally came in June when Colorado State reversed their decision, accepting McCoy on a full athletic scholarship for the incoming class.

The university based their decision on documents filed by McCoy to appeal her initial rejection by the university.

Though McCoy will attend Colorado State in the fall with a swimming scholarship, her parents filed suit based on financial, emotion and psychological harm they claim they and McCoy suffered during her period of uncertainty.

Mary McCoy, who is not a lawyer, is representing her daughter in the lawsuit with the help of an out-of-state attorney who is a relative. The suit was filed against the school district, Brasel and John Shaughnessy, the principal of Lafayette High.

The suit claims that the guidance counseling department of Lafayette School conspired to bar McCoy from receiving her scholarship through submitting a "derogatory and inaccurate" recommendation form.

According to the suit, during the three-month time period between McCoy's rejection from Colorado State and the reversal of the decision, McCoy and her parents suffered direct and indirect consequential damages.

The suit seeks a total of $75,000 in compensatory damages, punitive damages and pre-and post-judgment interest.

"If the department procedures are found to be flawed, our main goal after finding out why this happened is to correct it so this doesn't happen again to any other student," Mary McCoy said.

The McCoys may get an attorney in the future, she said.

"There's so much we don't know," McCoy said. "We don't know where we're heading, as far as that goes. We haven't even thought that far in advance."

So as I read this, I wondered: what is the case law on this subject? And I found this discussion about the liability of counselors in giving erroneous advice here:

The complaint indicates that, as a direct result of receiving the recommendation form, the Colorado State University admissions office declined to admit Shannon to the university, leaving her without any other viable options for receiving a college scholarship to a four-year institution. In 2003, the Wisconsin Supreme Court applied governmental immunity to a guidance counselor sued by a student to whom the counselor had provided inaccurate information regarding student athlete scholarship eligibility requirements, causing the student to lose a four-year university scholarship. Scott v. Savers Property & Casualty Ins. Co., 663 N.W.2d 715 (Wis. 2003). Before Scott, the Iowa Supreme Court recognized a cause of action for educational malpractice by a student against a guidance counselor based on the counselor's negligent representation that a course would satisfy the National Collegiate Athletic Association's core course requirements for eligibility. As a result of the counselor's mistake, the student was ineligible, and his athletic scholarship was revoked. The court concluded that a school district can be held liable for educational malpractice just as an attorney can be liable for legal malpractice. Sain v. Cedar Rapids Comm. Sch. Dist., 626 N.W.2d 115 (Iowa 2001).]

So there's not much there about a teacher's (or counselor's) liability in filling out recommendation letters.

I write recommendation letters all the time. I work over them, writing each one very specifically. I have been told that some teachers use a boilerplate, but I think that is wrong and makes the whole recommendation letter pointless.

However, every so often there is a request from a kid that I cannot in all honesty recommend very highly. So I have been known to say no rather than lie or exaggerate.

Before I DO agree to write a recommendation letter, I ask the student to provide me with a college resume (our college counselor has all the kids who wish to go to college do this and a listing of the classes they've taken, since it has sometimes been a while since I had that student in class. I am very careful to be honest in filling out the recommendation on what is known as the "Common Application" that is used to attend many highly selective schools. One part of this form contains a survey of personal and academic qualities with a range of check-boxes running the gamut from "poor" to "one of the top students in my career" or something like that. In all of my time filling out these applications, I have checked that top box three times. All three kids were National Merit Finalists, yes, but also amazingly selfless peer helpers, active in their community, and deep thinkers and lovers of knowledge. These were kids who had their heads on straight and their hearts on fire. I cannot in good conscience check that box very often, no matter how "nice" a kid is.

I have no idea if what the counselor wrote was honest or a vendetta, of course, but I will say this: getting into a college or attaining a scholarship is serious business. If you are not willing to put in the time to write an honest yet positive recommendation, just say no when kids ask you. You'll be doing yourself a favor.

Reprise: New Teacher Advice and Tricks of the Trade

This is a reprint of a post I originally wrote in June of 2006. It's been pretty heavily searched the last few days, so I am reposting it again.



I imagine that there are scads of people out there in the world who have gotten the happy news that they have been hired for the upcoming school year. There are more hopefuls who are currently undergoing that agony known as interviewing as they search for their first teaching contract.

Therefore, I feel that it is my duty as an official Wizened Veteran of the Classroom (I prefer this term to Ancient Hidebound Broad) to share the knowledge I have gained through sweat, toil, and personal peril lo, these many years, as a lion-tamer pedagogue. Several of my edusphere friends have also generously contributed their insight. This post has now become a kind of "Carnival of Classroom Survival," in fact!

First, oh paduan, consider classroom management.

Have only the rules you are willing to consistently enforce, and consistently enforce the rules you have. Have general classroom expectations written up in a succinct style, avoiding "Don't"s, and hand them out the first day of school. Try to keep the expectations to five.

Post the learning goal and agenda for the day on the board every day. Include homework to be assigned and due date.

Never threaten a consequence to a student unless you are actually willing to follow through with it. This is vital in making your life easier for the rest of the year. You must be a person of your word.

Write referrals only after you have attempted lesser consequences, including privately conferencing with the student and calling the student's guardian. If the student is displaying certain kinds of emotional outbursts which seem "over the top" or otherwise unwarranted, you might also consider a non-discipline referral to the counselor, if you have access to them. You will earn the disdain of your administrators if you write up students without following these steps first. Furthermore, some administrators will use your "failure" to attempt to deal with the situation yourself as an excuse to refuse to act upon their part. Linda adds: "Read the student discipline code, and frame any disciplinary referrals in EXACTLY those words. I failed to do this last year, in a new school, and didn't realize that the magic word (level 2 offense) was "disrespectful". When that word was used, the administration acted."

Keep track of each attempt you have made to deal with a difficulty. When the Wizened Veteran was starting out, she began to keep a binder divided by class period, with a sheet for each student she had had to discipline. I have also used a computer, but a binder is more portable. Whether on paper or on computer, this is an easy reference to use, but keep it secure. I did not fill this out in front of the students.

Don't be afraid to call guardians. If you call a guardian and only get an answering machine or voicemail, leave a message for the guardian asking him or her to call in a pleasantly neutral voice and record when you did this. Don't get into the gory details in a message.

Before calling, find out what the name of the student's guardian is, and what relationship that person has to the student. Don't assume that they share a last name or that they are necessarily the mother or father. Loads of kids are being raised by grandparents, aunts, and even older siblings. In fact, as mister teacher relates, don't make assumptions based on appearance about guardians upon meeting them, either. Everyone used to think that my mother was my grandmother, for instance, because she was older than the other parents. Another teacher adds, "Not all teachers have to worry about this, but in addition to finding out who lives at home, etc, I have to find out what language they speak so I can have an interpreter ready if the need be." This is also something which is a consideration more often than you might think. Of course, I once had a kid whose parents spoke Russian, so there wasn't much help there. For that problem, I have two words for you: Babel Fish. You can type text in and get a pretty reasonable translation back in all kinds of languages. I have used it with great success.

Aprilmay also has an excellent suggestion: "Find the adult who has the most influence on the child when you need to deal with serious issues. It can take some work, but oftentimes a "Nana" or favorite auntie can work wonders when it comes to motivation!" I have had hardened thugs who quaked in the face of a harsh word from Gramma.

Start your conversation by expressing your faith in the student to resolve the issue. Try, "Hello Mrs. Pzzlethwt? I am Junior Pzzlethwt's math teacher at Extraordinary High School. How are you today?"

Then, remember, a gentle word turns away wrath, as this lovely lady once demonstrated. Euphemisms are your friend! "Junior has some exceptional verbal skills, and I was hoping you could help me in persuading him to use them at the correct time." (This means Junior never shuts up.) Always remark that you know Junior has the potential to do better, and thank the guardian for their help in advance.

Don't ever get into a contest of wills with a parent or a student. They don't have to agree with you-- as in, your attitude should calmly be, "You don't have to agree with me, but this is what will happen..." And sorry to say, guardians get to be rude to you with few consequences, but you will be nailed if you are rude to them.

Script the basic gist of what is said during the phone call, and keep that in your binder, along with time and date of call. I once pulled this out when a parent insisted I call her from the principal's office, and very mildly read back to her her own words which she was denying. She had been insisting that I had never contacted her about her darling's difficulty. When she saw that I had a record of every conversation, complete with time and duration of call, she gave up. As our friend nyc educator points out, this also helps cover one's posterior with one's administrators.

Emails, if you have the means, are even better, but still be diplomatic in your wording, because, remember, emails can be forwarded a million times over without your knowledge. And keep a copy of the email you sent-- I printed them out and saved them in the binder.

Start the class on time. Do not cheat the students who are on time in the name of stragglers who stumble in tardy.

Model good behavior. I personally say please and thank you to my students. I somehow have difficulty hearing students who do not extend the same courtesy to me. It's a very strange form of deafness.

Try to get the students on your side when it comes to classroom management. It is actually much more effective if a student knows that his peers will not tolerate his goofing off or disrupting class.

Graycie has another good point: "Walk out amongst 'em. Sometimes just standing next to a kid and smiling without breaking the flow of what you are saying to the whole class will stop her dead in her tracks." Slowly move around the room, if your instruction permits it. It will keep all the students on their toes, encourage participation, and keep heads from drooping.

Mr. Lawrence makes an excellent suggestion to which I personally adhere. Consider placing your desk at the backs of your students. This enables you to see what is going on unobtrusively. Students will realize this and they will stay on task with much less prompting. Our district has laptop computers that the students can use. With my desk behind the students, I can view screens easily to see what exactly they're looking at on the 'net- whether they're actually doing research or if they're trying to IM their friends or access Facebook.

Keep the students engaged until the bell rings. Remember, you-- NOT the bell-- dismiss the class. Otherwise, each day the students will knock off a bit earlier. If you need to, introduce a small quiz at this point rather than at the beginning of class.

Mike in Texas reminds us, "Trust, but verify." When a child claims that she has done the technicolor yawn, tossed his cookies, ralphed, whatever-- make sure she has. Oh, and watch for the finger-down-the-throat trick before a quiz or test.

And seriously, if a student feels ill, goes to the restroom, and doesn't come back in four or five minutes, send a trustworthy kid of the same gender to go check on her. She may have passed out in there, or she may be scamming and roaming the halls. In either case, you want to know.

Darren adds: "'Without' is a powerful word. When giving instructions, simultaneously tell students what you want them to do (using concrete terms) and what you don't want them to do. 'Please open your textbooks to page 73 without talking.' Telling students to "be quiet" doesn't work; telling them what to do (take out your textbooks) and what not to do (without talking) does. Give it a try!"

Now, let us consider supplies.

Part of your job as a teacher is to reinforce a burgeoning sense of personal responsibility in your young charges.

If you keep pencils or pens on your desk, they will disappear. If you can afford this, fine. However, a word of warning. If you consistently give out pencils or paper or whatever, expect your students to regularly come to class without them, knowing that you will remove this responsibility from their shoulders. Your choice. I use very bizarre novelty pens for myself, and anyone trying to cadge one of these would be busted immediately.

Same thing with textbooks. If you give out textbooks to those who do not bring theirs, soon no one will bring their texts to class. If you want to distribute ten of them every class period and lose five minutes of teaching time, that's your choice, but plan accordingly. Make sure you take them up at the end of the period (another five minutes lost there) or you will be missing a whole slew of books by the third week of school. And while you're managing this distribution, what are the other students doing?

I like keeping a little box of golf pencils in my desk for those who cannot master their writing utensil management skills. Students tend not to want to borrow these more than once. You can also keep a cup of used pencils you have found in the hallway for distribution. I personally also like to have my dog or a convenient toddler to put chew marks on them so they won't be so appealing to those who seem need some assistance from St. Anthony of Padua in this regard.

On the other hand, be on the lookout for a student who cannot afford supplies. I often claim to have "found" spirals or pencils for these students lying around unclaimed in my classroom, and privately let them know what a favor they would be doing me if they could possibly put them to use instead of forcing me to harm the environment by discarding them. These items are often found for sale in bulk at the end of July through the first few days of September. You can often buy spirals for a dime-- those that are sold this way are called "loss-leaders" because the supply stores take a beating on them to get you into the store. I buy about thirty for myself each year, and those I don't use, I donate to a needy school affiliated with my house of worship.

Q's personal legend has a neat system: "I also have a station in the room for stuff the kids can use: stapler, hand sanitizer, hole punch, kleenex, etc. And, (you will laugh), I made large magic marker outlines of these things on the table. It looks funny, but the kids always return it to its 'home,' and I don't have to keep saying, 'Where is my stapler?!'"

And, since teachers are often klutzy because we are rushed, and kids are just klutzy in general, I suggest you keep the following things on hand in your desk in a little box (one of my students made one for me): Shout wipes, plug-in air fresheners, odor neutralizer spray, antiperspirant, a needle and some thread, safety pins, peppermints, lotion, astringent, cotton pads (like the ones used by the nurse), latex gloves, bandaids, and a flashlight with working batteries. I once had the power go out for TWO HOURS in a room with no windows. And we were instructed to keep the kids in the room while they tried to fix it. Fun.

Now, let's deal with presentation and attitude.

Boy Scout motto? Be prepared. Teacher motto? OVERPLAN. Always have more activities on hand than you can possibly use in a class period.

Have a sense of humor. Be willing to laugh gently at yourself. Self-deprecation goes a long way to establishing a sense of rapport with your students.

Keep a folder on your desk in case you ever need a sub. I label it "SUB FOLDER" in really large, bright letters. Include in it your classroom expectations, UPDATED seating charts, complete with pronunciation guides if needed, and an emergency lesson for each class in case you get hit by a runaway oxcart on the way to work and have no chance to send in real lesson plans. Make it simple, but interesting. Mr. Lawrence, who works as a substitute, echoes this advice. You cannot expect the students to read quietly for two hours for a sub. (There are all kinds of books in the bookstore or classroom supply stores that have suggestions for cute little activities, if your brain is befuddled.) I usually include at least one activity which must be turned in by the end of class to keep the students occupied. Once again, OVERPLAN, leaving the sub the option of granting the students a reprieve on a deadline or on an assignment if they behave superbly. Carrots and sticks, people, is better when you've need more carrot rather than more stick. In the classroom expectations, you would be wise to spell out your policies on quizzes and tests, such as "All quizzes are to be done individually by the students, not as group work or in 'Jeopardy' format." I have had subs who have allowed students to use their books on unit tests or to do them as a group. No kidding.

Always err toward joking rather than bitching with your coworkers. You make a first impression only once, but you can ruin your reputation over and over.

Spangles, one of our colleagues, notes, "Eat lunch with your colleagues. It builds bonds, lets you form a friendly relationship, and gets you out of the classroom for at least a few minutes. You might give it up later, but it's a worth a start. I was a young new teacher and I formed a strong bond with my older, wiser team members because I ate lunch with them each and every day. It made it easier to laugh at myself and my students." Excellent advice. Your colleagues are your lifeline.

However, unless you have the metabolism of a three-year-old, avoid cafeteria food and bring your lunch. Cafeteria food includes a percentage of fat and amount of calories geared toward growing young bodies. If you don't want a widening older body, stay away from the ersatz nachos and mystery meat chili and the turkey burgers. But don't skip lunch.

Do not get angry, and strive not to take things personally. If the kids know they can provoke you, they will try to do it at every opportunity. Remember the scene in Finding Nemo when Bruce gets a whiff of Dory's blood? Avoid tempting your students in this fashion. I personally get quieter when students are crossing the line. Work on developing a "look" which strikes wrongdoers dumb. Works wonders.

Our colleague Tree_Story adds: "Your best friends can be the custodians and front office secretary. Be courteous and always say thank you and they can make your year soooo much nicer." Happychyck includes the building or district tech person in this golden circle of demigods, and rightly so.

Graycie reminds us: "Never be afraid to say, 'I don't know. How can we find out?'" Then have the students actually find the answer. The goal of teaching students is to enable them to get along without a teacher. Don't just abandon questions they've asked to which you do not know the answer-- these are the questions which have sparked their interest, and a good teacher wants to fan that spark into an inferno.

And finally, consider health maintenance.

Wear comfortable shoes with some support. Teachers have some of the worst back problems of all professions because we spend so much time on our feet. Avoid heels. You will rarely sit down.

Keep yourself hydrated.

You've heard of GIGO (Garbage In, Garbage Out)? Remember WIWO (Water In, Water Out). Yes, since what goes in must come out, also try to avoid the common teacher pitfall of not going to the can until 4 pm. You will get kidney and bladder problems, and with your insurance, you can't afford that.

Offer students a couple of points of extra credit to bring in two good boxes of tissue at the start of the school year if your school does not provide the good stuff. You'll thank me during flu season.

Have two trash cans in your room: one for student use, and one for you. You'll see why this is health related in a second.

Have two boxes of tissue out at any one time. One box should be hidden away for you, and the used tissues go into your personal trash can, which I stash behind my desk. The other box is for the students, and should be placed away from your desk or where you stand most often in the room. The student trash can goes under this box of tissue, and away from you. You will avoid a LOT of colds this way. Trust me. With your insurance, you can't afford that either, not to mention that it takes FOUR hours to write lesson plans for a seven hour day.

Keep disinfecting wipes and hand sanitizer in your desk. Wipe down the surfaces of your desk regularly, including phone, particularly if Mary Typhus, who is hacking up a storm, has just used your phone to talk to her mom. Clean the student desks and the doorknob every once in a while, as well.

Finally, if you are really sick, don't go to school. You will make yourself worse, and end up using the princely number of sick days you have been allotted in one mad swoop.


Well, those are some of my sure-fire, handy dandy tips. If anyone has any others, I'd be glad to add them on with credit given.

Now, go get 'em, Tiger.

Of Layoffs, Seniority, and Bad Teachers: An Educational Bermuda Triangle

News junkie that I am, I was reading Newsweek (a shadow of its former self, but that's a gripe for another day because I have to have my fix) and ran across this article. Please note the paragraphs that I have placed in boldface. There may be a quiz later. (Oooh, I AM getting back into the swing of things! Maybe I should go lay down till this passes..... nahhh.)

Education reformers were feeling optimistic. With President Obama’s Race to the Top competition, which offers financial rewards to states willing to hold teachers accountable for their students’ performance, they’ve made real progress in weeding out poor teachers.

But now the reformers have spotted a dark cloud on the horizon. State budgets, particularly in badly managed big states like California, New York, and New Jersey, are out of control. Although Congress managed to avoid massive teacher layoffs last year with federal aid, the stimulus money is running out, and congressmen do not appear to be in the mood for more deficit spending. That means teacher layoffs are coming—perhaps more than 100,000 nationwide. In most states, union contracts or state law requires they be done by seniority, so the newest teachers are pink-slipped, no matter how good they are. “ ‘Last in, first out’ virtually guarantees that all our great, young teachers will be out of a job, and some of the least effective will stay in the classroom,” says Tim Knowles, director of the Urban Education Institute at the University of Chicago.

Such layoffs disproportionately hurt students attending the lowest-performing schools, because they tend to have the highest proportion of new teachers. In some Los Angeles schools last year, such cuts wiped out 50 to 70 percent of the faculty.

One surprising solution may come from Knowles’s home city of Chicago. The state of Illinois is one of the worst-run in the country, rivaling even California for its unwillingness to take the steps necessary to stanch the flow of red ink. As a result, Chicago is facing pressure to cut 900 teacher jobs. Under the usual union contract, the last hired were to be the first fired, competent or not.

But the Chicago School Board, handpicked by the Windy City’s tough-minded Mayor Richard M. Daley, has interpreted a new state law as giving it the power to fire the city’s 200 most incompetent teachers first.

While this might seem like common sense, it’s heresy to Karen Lewis, the newly elected head of the Chicago teachers’ union, who is considering going to court to fight the attack on seniority. “I admit, this is a great PR tool. Why not lay off the bad teachers first?” she conceded in an interview with NEWSWEEK. But on closer inspection, she says, there is no way of doing it fairly. In Chicago’s troubled urban school district, 99 percent of the 23,000 or so teachers are rated “excellent” or “superior,” while less than 0.1 percent are rated “unsatisfactory.” Employing some creative logic, Lewis asks: “Why are the worst evaluations believable, but the best are not?”

Reformers scoff at the union boss’s arguments. “While principals may not be consistently evaluating their teachers to the extent that they should, they certainly know who the worst teachers are in their buildings and have been using all sorts of tricks of the trade over the years to get these teachers to move to other schools,” says Kate Walsh of the National Council on Teacher Quality, a reform advocacy group.

Largely because of the carrots dangled by Race to the Top, a growing number of states, including Colorado, Tennessee, Delaware, and Oklahoma, have changed their laws to make teacher performance a factor in tenure and firing decisions, but very few can use it to make layoff decisions. The District of Columbia’s public-school system is one place that can. Arizona has gone the furthest, making it illegal to consider seniority in layoff, tenure, and even rehiring decisions. But defying the unions is hard going. In New York, Mayor Michael Bloomberg had to back away from layoffs based on performance and shoot for an across-the-board pay freeze.

Analysts say that states’ money troubles will continue to shrink budgets over the next year, and school districts that have already cut to the bone will have to find new ways to make less go further. Weeding out the weakest teachers and keeping the most effective “is the only policy that makes sense for districts to implement in tough times,” says Walsh. After all, when student needs bump up against adult needs, is there any question whose should come first?

Okay, now let's attack this logically. I will deal with boldfaced item number two first-- I will circle back to the boldfaced part of paragraph 1 later.

So, "all our great young teachers will be out of a job...." Now, use of the word "all" usually sends up red flags for me in statements like this. But then again, I want to point out that not all of any age cohort is either "great" or incompetent, so there will also be some rotten young teachers who will be out of a job when using seniority as a basis. And there are some great young teachers, and some rotten young teachers. Just being a young teacher doesn't guarantee that you are "great." I am and will continue to be troubled (and enraged) by the assumption that those of us who have been in the classroom (mumble) years are either lazy lovers of the sinecure of tenure or at the very least losers who may have some skills but if we were really talented we would have demonstrated the gumption to get out of the classroom ghetto and out into the really important arena of administration of policy-wonkiness. Running throughout the criticism of public school teachers is a strong dismissal of experience in the classroom. This criticism runs from the greenest 23-year-old assistant principal (we had one who had spent a grand total of six months in an actual classroom before making the jump into hyperspace faster than you can say "Chewie, get us out of here!" He didn't last long as an AP either-- he's now teaching in a school of education somewhere. Ah, irony!) to people like Michelle Rhee (3 yrs in TFA before she got the heck out of Dodge) and Arne Duncan (0 years teaching experience but several years of playing basketball with President Obama which has stood him in good stead). Since many of these people felt little to no desire to really attempt to BE the lion tamer, they denigrate anyone who has the willingness to do so. No, they just want to stand outside the ring and claim that since they've been to a lot of circuses, they KNOW how to be a lion tamer-- it's just that they've got more important things to do. There must be something wrong with anyone who is sucker enough to be an experienced teacher, and it must be that incompetence and having nowhere else to go must explain this refusal to move up and beyond. Supposedly, school reformers want great teachers, but those great teachers shouldn't stay for more than three years, or there must be something wrong with them.

Second, I am deeply troubled by the fact that only .1% of Chicago teachers are rated as "unsatisfactory." Something smells here. Now here is where the next item comes in. So let's look at the most troubling quote of all, which bears repeating:

"While principals may not be consistently evaluating their teachers to the extent that they should, they certainly know who the worst teachers are in their buildings and have been using all sorts of tricks of the trade over the years to get these teachers to move to other schools."

Here is where the outrage starts for me. Let me be very clear: I DO NOT WANT INCOMPETENT TEACHERS IN MY PROFESSION. And I have taught next to some real doozies. But my next bit of outrage has always been this: how did they get there to begin with? In this discussion, there is some definite incompetence being overlooked, all right. We have incompetent teachers in the classroom because we have incompetent administrators who refuse to get up and enforce very clear policies. And this has gone on for years.

Let's break it down. Although "tenure" means very little in a "right to work" state such as those I have lived in all my life, there is nonetheless a process for evaluating teachers. In my district, a new teacher is supposed to be evaluated twice a year until their "probationary" status ends after five years. That's ten evaluations at a minimum. And if there are signs of trouble, there can be more. There should be more. And if administrators are doing their jobs, AND if they truly know what good teaching is (another big if given the paucity of teaching experience of the administrators themselves), then tenure should never be an issue. But there's not. Why is Ms. Walsh so dismissive of the incompetence demonstrated at this crucial step of the process by administrators? It seems that, when it comes right down to it, it's not necessarily incompetent teachers many reformers are after: it is simply the bugaboo of tenure on the way to privatizing public schools. The term "incompetent teachers" as a propaganda tool serves an important function for those who want to privatize public education, in the same way that the hot-button term of "abortion" serves an important function for Republican policy-makers. Both are far too valuable to ever really be gotten rid of, because these phrases shut off thinking and cause many people to react viscerally, often against their overall interests.

This is all too often the way. Some examples: Conservatives (in both parties) claim to hate illegal immigration, but the businessmen who write the checks for their political campaigns love that cheap labor and its depressing effect on wages across the board for American workers. So they rail against illegal immigration on the one hand, but then frantically fight the enforcement of laws already on the books which make it illegal to hire illegal immigrants. Take away the economic incentive if you really want to end "illegal" immigration.

Or this: States pass involuntary confinement laws for the most dangerous sexual predators, which are not only probably a violation of civil liberties, but (do not think I have ANYTHING but loathing for sexual predators) ALSO COMPLETELY UNNECESSARY. If we sentenced sexual predators with the severity their crimes deserve, they would never serve the ends of their sentences, and we would never have to resort to locking them up AFTER their sentences are served.

Okay, now, those were some very emotionally powerful examples, and we could talk about those all day. But we are here to talk about firing incompetent teachers. If we just shrug our shoulders at the refusal by administrators to do their duty and truly evaluate teachers, WHY should we give those same people the right to fire any teacher at any time at will? Do we really think that such a sweeping power should be entrusted to people who can't be bothered to come out of their offices and perform one of their primary functions? In fact, isn't that a far more dangerous idea than simply abolishing "tenure?"

As discussed before, "Race to the Top" often requires the use of a flamethrower where a surgical strike would be more apropos. There are a few school districts in my general vicinity who have finally been taken over by the state due to their utter failure to provide educational opportunity for their students. But rather than firing incompetent administrators and teachers, what usually happens is that all of the teachers-- all of them-- are fired, regardless of tenure, and the administrators are retained. The most that may happen is that they are shuffled around to another position in that same failing district. A teacher's real competence does not matter. There must be someone to blame when a school district fails-- and it so much easier- yes, easier!- to fire all of the teachers rather than to realize that just as there are often bad teachers even in good schools, there are also great teachers even in bad schools. But "Race to the Top" does not provide for any such subtlety in thinking, and often, as we see, it is already just accepted that teachers' good evaluations should be dismissed as untrustworthy. You may think, "Well, the good teachers will always find a job." In the most recent case in my area, however, teachers were left in limbo until THIS WEEK to find out that they had been summarily fired, and by now, there are no openings for the coming school year-- except at the schools in which these teachers already taught, of course. And we've already pointed out that the assumption is, if you teach in a poorly performing school, you must be an incompetent teacher. (And they wonder why the most highly qualified teachers often aren't willing to teach in the most high-risk schools? Really? Think, people!)

Finally, "Race to the Top" will not result in having better teachers in the most broken schools. If teachers are going to be held accountable for their students' test scores without any other consideration (such as poverty levels, community support of schools, student willingness to learn or, yes, even tenure) then why would any sane teacher take the risk of going to a school where test scores are going to be abysmal for all of those other reasons listed above? Especially if I wish to teach for my career rather than be an administrator or a policy-wonk? If Michelle Rhee really single-handedly raised her students' test scores so much during her three years in TFA, why didn't she see how heroic it would have been for her to remain in the classroom year after year and perform a true miracle for the thousands of students she should have encountered during a log a fruitful career? She could single-handedly have ENSURED that thousands of children could have been raised out of ignorance and poverty! It would have been a SURE THING. Right?

I will close with a true story. I have actually witnessed the firing of an incompetent teacher on a (very) few occasions in my career. But except in one single case, a part of the deal was that the administrators would provide a neutral recommendation in place of the honest evaluation that should have gone into this person's file. That simply passed the buck on and allowed that person to continue to seek employment in the field of education-- usually in some high-poverty, urban school district that is looking for ANY warm body to fill a slot at some of the most at-risk schools. Which brings us back to the problem of school districts like Chicago. Somewhere, this circle has got to be broken. Shouldn't student needs trump those of adults? Incompetence at both the teacher and administrator level serves the purpose of no one.

Or does it?

Another year older, another year of memory loss and weight gain

Five years of blogging as of today. Not always good blogging, sometimes I've hit writers block for weeks due to all kinds of crap, but you, you've hung in there with me. And I appreciate it.

We've seen highs. We've seen lows. We've laughed our butts off and been deadly serious.

Thanks for sharing in my madness that really has no method.

Tuesday Musing Open Thread 2: Qualifications for hiring teachers

For your consideration: If you were given the chance to revamp the hiring process in your school, what would be the top qualifications you would look for in teachers being hired to fill open positions? How do these compare with the qualifications that are currently in use by your school district?

Let's discuss.