If it's a pretend administrator, is it a real observation?

We have the most wonderfullest idea that has been created by our district administration this year, and it has had amusingly unforeseen consequences for Ms. Cornelius.

Here's the deal: the Powers That Be have revived the farcical "Leadership Cadre." What might this be, you ask? Well, remember that our district has an absolutely stellar record of hiring district employees for administration jobs-- and by stellar I imply events so rare as to be separated by light-years.

But wait! Let's get some teachers who have administrative certification-- and frankly, no hope in hell of actually being hired-- fill in when one of our peripatetic assistant principals gets to go jaunting off to a conference in Orlando or Bimini or Noo Yawk. Boom! Voila! "Leadership Cadre!" These chumps members of the Leadership Cadre will then garner administrative experience. Forget that whilst these ersatz nabobs are substitute nabobing, they will not be fulfilling the function for which they were hired and for which a school district exists: namely, teaching students. No; let the students eat substitutes!

Now, there is one particular dewy-eyed dreamer who leapt at this chance-- whom I will call "Bob," since "Sawed-Off Runt" seems far too brutal, if apropos. I can see the attraction of administration for Bob. He only puts eight grades in the gradebook per semester as it is, but if he becomes an AP he has figured out that that number will drop to zero. And that's less, right? (Did I mention Bob teaches math?)

So the other day, there was Bob be-bopping around in his little pressed suit, haunting the hallways for something to do that didn't actually involve confronting the fifteen kids he passed who didn't have passes and weren't in class. How do I know this? Because when I first spotted him I was performing administrative duties myself against my will instead of being able to work with students, which is a story for another day.

So Bob disappeared from my radar screen while I dealt with the crew of Skippies he had so assiduously failed to recognize. Quelle suprise, his absence from my notice didn't last long.

Later on I am standing in front of a class of frolicksome students, discussing the current situation in the Sudan before we got ready for a quiz, when suddenly Bob materializes on my doorstep. 'Pon my honor, he actually opened with the gambit of "Whatcha doin'?"

Let's see: kids, in desks, hands raised, synapses firing. Adult in front of room in comfortable shoes and khakis, pointing at map. What does it look like I'm doing?

And it got worse from there. HE. WOULDN'T. LEAVE. He peered at my learning goals on the board. He hemmed. He hawed. He cleared his throat unctuously. He struggled to come up with some sort of pedagogic nugget of wisdom, but lapsed into straightening his tie for the fourteenth time. He called out the names of kids he knew like a late-night caller to a radio request show. His fidgetty presence halted the momentum of the Ship of Knowledge we had been sailing more thoroughly than a German torpedo fired at the Lusitania. The kids were fascinated by his flitting about the room-- they couldn't help it.

After he finally skedaddled for parts unknown, I resumed doing that strange thing he didn't recognize for the sad remnant of the class period. It wasn't until lunch that I realized the little blister had been attempting to observe me.

And he may beat those odds in terms of getting a full-time gig. He has "administrator" written all over him. All I know is that my students learned less, and he undoubtedly learned nothing.

I have just one thing to say....

Mercy! Give me a doggone break.

Ever had a nightmare that just wouldn't end?

Well, I'm having five of 'em all at once.

GAH!

Update...

You will, I hope, be pleased to learn that the administrators in our school district have realized that, yes, they were on the verge of violating federal law with my student about whom I wrote last week. So she is back in class, and hopefully there will be no more problems. Poop heads. So there's something good that happened this week.

Incredible lack of judgment, part II

EWWWWWWWWW.

"SEATTLE — Washington state law does not bar teachers from having consensual sex with 18-year-old students, an appeals court ruled Tuesday in dismissing a case against a former high school choir teacher.

The teacher, Matthew Hirschfelder, was charged with first-degree sexual misconduct with a minor for allegedly having sex with a Hoquiam High School senior in 2006. He challenged a judge's refusal to dismiss his case, arguing the student wasn't a minor because she was 18.

Hirschfelder, who was 33 at the time, also denies any sexual relationship occurred.

A three-judge panel of the Washington Court of Appeals unanimously agreed that the case should be dismissed. While the law was written vaguely, a review of legislative history shows that lawmakers only intended to criminalize contact between teachers and 16- or 17-year-old students — not those over 18, the court said.

"The name of the statute is 'sexual misconduct with a minor,'" said Hirschfelder's attorney, Rob Hill, stressing that the state recognizes that an 18-year-old is no longer a minor.

The state's code of professional conduct for teachers still prohibits any sexual advance toward or contact with pupils, whatever their age, and teachers can be fired for it. Sexual contact with students younger than 16 is considered child rape or molestation; the age of consent in Washington is 16.

Hirschfelder has not been able to work as a teacher since late 2006, when he was placed on administrative leave pending an investigation by the school board. He was arrested and charged in spring 2007, after a former choir student told police she had a monthslong affair with him that began shortly before she graduated.

His case did not go to trial because it was stayed pending the appeals court ruling, Hill said. He has been tuning pianos to make ends meet.

Grays Harbor County Prosecutor Stew Menefee did not immediately return a call from The Associated Press, but he told The Daily World newspaper of Aberdeen that he would consider appealing to the state Supreme Court.

Some state legislators are set on changing the law. On Monday, six state representatives introduced legislation that would make it a crime punishable by a mandatory minimum of five years in prison for a teacher to have sex with a student up to age 21, as long as the teacher is five years older than the student and at the same school.

Rep. Larry Haler, R-Richland, the main sponsor of the bill, said he offered it at the request of the Richland School District, after a judge dropped a sexual misconduct charge against a Richland High School teacher because the teacher's alleged victim was 18.

"This is a real concern of mine, and with the court decision today, that just strengthens this bill," Haler said. "We need to protect our students as long as they're in our public schools, irrespective of age."
"

I understand the reason why this law doesn't apply. I do. But it needs to be clear that teachers should not EVER be allowed to "date" students, even if they're twenty-one (and we've got two of those around this year, and they better stay the hell away from my daughter, much less me). But I am confused by the provision in the proposed replacement law about the teacher being five years older than the student. So are they saying it would be okay if the teacher were, say 22 and the student were 18? Why would that be okay?

Of course, I didn't date high school boys when I WAS in high school, so perhaps my knee-jerk antipathy started then. But-- really. Yuck.

Flotsam and jetsam from the news

Here are some interesting, shiny bits that caught my eye:

1. This is just "crackers." From Irvine, CA:

The box of crackers Debra Rogoff bought from the grocery store had some crackerjack in it - an envelope stuffed with $10,000.

Yet the Irvine woman was more curious than ecstatic about her daughter's find. After all, who would leave money in such a place?

"We just thought, 'This is someone's money,'" she said. "We would never feel good about spending it."

Rather than go on a shopping spree, the family called police and was initially told the money could be part of a drug drop.

Police later heard from store managers at Whole Foods in Tustin that an elderly woman had come in a few days earlier, hysterical because she had mistakenly returned a box of crackers with her life savings inside. In a mix-up the store restocked the box rather than composting it.

The Lake Forest woman, whose identity was not released, had lost faith in her bank and decided the box would be a safer place for the money.

Luckily for her, the box of Annie's Sour Cream and Onion Cheddar Bunny crackers were bought by the Rogoffs, who discovered the crisp $100 bills in an unmarked white envelope on Oct. 10.

The Rogoffs never heard from the woman and didn't receive a reward, but Rogoff did return to Whole Foods a couple weeks later.

"I asked them if I could have another box of crackers," she said with a laugh. The store obliged.

Yeah, that was MUCH safer than a bank.

2. To make this a perfect story, shouldn't this have been a "cat burglar?" From Murray, UT:

A thief remains at large after pulling off a daring heist - in the pet food aisle.

Surveillance video at a supermarket in this Salt Lake City suburb caught a dog shoplifting, KSL-TV reported Wednesday.

The video showed the dog walking in the front door of Smith's Food & Drug in Murray, and heading straight to Aisle 16, the pet food aisle, where it grabbed a bone worth $2.79.

The thief wasn't even perturbed by a face-to-face confrontation with store manager Roger Adamson.

"I looked at him. I said 'Drop it!'" Adamson said. "He looked at me, and I looked at him, and he ran for the door and away he went, right out the front door."

I heard that the store manager's nickname was Paddywhack. So come on-- it's just a nick-knack, Paddywhack! Give the dog a bone!

3. All together now: "You don't jump on Superman's cape, you don't spit into the wind...." Or at a crime scene, apparently, especially in Oklahoma, where we know from tobacco spit:

A trail of tobacco spit has led investigators to a suspect in at least five burglaries across eastern Oklahoma, police said.

Randy Lee Shoopman Jr., 33, was charged with 11 counts of second-degree burglary after a sample of his DNA matched that taken from expectorant left behind at the scene of several burglaries in Oklahoma, said officer Brad Robertson, a spokesman for the Tahlequah police department.

Shoopman was taken into custody Friday in Merced, Calif., on an unrelated stolen property charge, Robertson said.

Investigators also said Shoopman may be involved in break-ins at businesses across eastern Oklahoma and in Missouri.

Stilwell police detective Chad Smith said he was investigating the burglary of an insurance company in September when he noticed a tobacco stain on papers in the ransacked office.

"None of the ladies that worked there chewed tobacco," Smith said. "You could tell that the stains were from the suspect."

Smith said he sent a sample of the spit to the Oklahoma State Bureau of Investigation for testing. Detectives in Tahlequah who were investigating Shoopman as a possible suspect in a string of burglaries obtained a warrant to get a DNA sample from him.

The sample linked him to at least five burglaries in which the suspect also left behind tobacco spit, Robertson said. Shoopman was released on bail before the DNA match was obtained.

The evidence helps build a strong case for prosecutors, said Shannon Otteson, assistant district attorney in Adair County.

"Eyewitness testimony is unreliable at best. Even video tape surveillance is sometimes grainy. But this is pretty good," Otteson said. "Through this guy's bad habit, we could possibly solve several different burglaries."

Oklahoma officials hoped to have Shoopman extradited from California soon to face charges, said Otteson.

A telephone message left Wednesday with Shoopman's attorney in Muskogee was not immediately returned.

Probably because he was out looking for a Hills Bros. Coffee Can that his client can carry on his next heist, if there is one.

4. Just goes to show that Darwin may have been on to something:

Fire officials in New Bedford, Mass., say a man using a blowtorch to melt ice on his back porch ended up setting his house on fire, causing up to $30,000 in damage.

Fire Capt. Scott Kruger tells The Standard-Times of New Bedford that no on was injured during Monday's incident at the three-story home.

Kruger says the man was using a torch hooked up to a 20-pound propane cylinder. He got too close to the building's wood frame and ignited the vinyl siding. The fire quickly spread into the building's second- and third-floor apartments.

It took 25 firefighters to subdue the blaze that damaged bedrooms in the upstairs units, and caused damage to the structure and wiring.

The homeowner will not be charged.

Hey Clark, Ellen, Rusty, and Audrey! Cousin Eddie lives!

Nice.

Check out this story:

DOYLESTOWN, Pa. - A teacher who was upset because she didn't get her preferred classroom assignment left more than a dozen scribbled threats at her elementary school and a suspicious device in a student's desk, authorities said.

Susan Romanyszyn, 45, was charged Thursday with 17 counts of making terroristic threats in connection with the incidents at Longstreth Elementary School in Warminster in October.

Authorities said the fourth-grade teacher scribbled messages on school walls and on paper that threatened bomb and gun violence. The messages were written in sloppy handwriting with numerous misspellings and some with crudely drawn cartoons, police said.

A prosecutor said the actions stemmed from Romanyszyn's assignment to teach fourth grade rather than fifth grade. "She was upset or disgruntled at not getting the classroom assignment she wanted," Bucks County District Attorney Michelle Henry said.

Police also allege Romanyszyn put a water bottle containing white power and screws into a student's desk and scattered nails around the lot where teachers parked, leading to school trips and activities being delayed or canceled.

In an interview with police, Romanyszyn denied having anything to do with the incidents and said she wasn't upset about not getting a fifth-grade teaching position, according to a court document. Her attorney rejected the allegations.

"In a case like this, you go on a person's character, and the character of this woman is out there for inspection," Sara Webster said. "Nobody says she's an angry person. She loved what she did, and she loved her students and she always got good evaluations."

Romanyszyn was arrested after authorities interviewed students, administrators and teachers and reviewed footage from school surveillance cameras, Warminster Police Chief Michael Murphy said.

Romanyszyn, who has been on administrative leave since Oct. 22, turned herself in to police and was released after posting $100,000 bail. She faces up to 10 years in jail if convicted.

Romanyszyn was previously a middle school teacher at Eugene Klinger Middle School, where in 2004 she was one of two elementary mathematics teachers selected as a state finalist for the Presidential Awards for Excellence in Mathematics and Science Teaching.

The accused teacher was once a finalist for a state-wide math teaching award. Amazing.

Here's Zoey 102: Don't have sex at 15, you daft little thing!

I hearby announce a temporary abeyance of any anti-Spears postings rule (and look how good I've been, too!) to bring you this little tale:

Yesterday, Preteen Daughter insisted that Jamie Lynn Spears is pregnant.

"Oh no, Ducks, that's just gossip!" I firmly responded.

This morning? After spitting the morning mouthful of tea halfway across the room over the morning paper, I had to eat crow. THAT was a wonderful conversation, lemme tell ya.

Luckily, PTD is still honestly barfed out by the idea of this activity. I hope that lasts at least a few more days-- and I hope she doesn't start thinking that this kind of stuff is no big deal or even cute.

So now, the incredibly fecund Spears girls have proved that they really don't teach about self control OR birth control down in Louisiana. This is also a great lesson (reinforced by Michael Vick and Paris Hilton) that having loads of money and lucky breaks thrown your way certainly do not ensure that one could be hit by the Great Flying Brick o' Common Sense upside the head.


But in a surprising move, Super Mommy Lynn Spears' book on parenting has been placed on hold indefinitely. That's good. Because I don't think the world needs any more advice on how to become wealthy by dint of your children whom you then allow to prance around looking like a child sex worker just to sell a bunch of vapid CDs and then you wonder how they got "in trouble."

Of course, neither one of these girls got this way without some help. Let's hear it for the impregnators, shall we?

I am just disgusted.

Recess-- an evil capitalist plot?

A principal in Connecticut has banned any sort of competitive activity from recess, claiming that students need to be protected from possible skinned knees or hurt feelings if they actually engage in competitive activities.

I. Am. Not. Kidding.



You know, there's another word for those kinds of activities. What is that word?

Oh yeah! "Fun."

Not to mention that this is yet another example of not allowing kids to just figure things out without some adult, no matter how well-meaning, riding to the rescue.

Children at the Oakdale School here in southeastern Connecticut returned this fall to learn that their traditional recess had gone the way of the peanut butter sandwich and the Gumby lunchbox.

No longer could they let off their youthful energy — pent up from hours of long division — by cavorting outside for 22 minutes of unstructured play, or perhaps with a vigorous game of tag or dodgeball. Such games had been virtually banned by the principal, Mark S. Johnson, along with kickball, soccer and other “body-banging” activities, as he put it, where knees — and feelings — might get bruised.

Instead, children are encouraged to jump rope, play with Hula Hoops or gently fling a Frisbee. Balls are practically controlled substances, parceled out under close supervision by playground monitors.

The traditional recess, a rite of grade school, is endangered not only in the Oakdale School here in Montville, a town of 18,500. From Cheyenne, Wyo., to Wyckoff, N.J., recess — long seen as a way for children to develop social competence, recharge after long lessons, and resist obesity — is being rethought and pared down.

In the face of this, a national campaign called Rescuing Recess, sponsored by such organizations as the Cartoon Network, the National Parent Teacher Association, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention and the National Education Association, has taken hold at many schools where parents and children fear that recess will go the way of the one-room schoolhouse.

At Oakdale, Mr. Johnson finally relaxed some prohibitions after a parade of parents complained. Now, twice a week when a parent or grandparent is present, fourth and fifth graders are allowed to play a modified version of kickball as long as the score is not kept. Many parents are still not satisfied, however, saying that such coddling fails to prepare children for adulthood.

“Life is competitive,” said Shari Clewell, the mother of a fifth grader. “Kids compete for attention. They compete for grades. You compete for a job. You compete from the time you’re little all the way to the end.”

Pretending otherwise is pointless, she said. “They’re kids. They are competitive. They can play jump rope and jacks and make it competitive.”

But the principal is determined. “I’m honestly one of the most competitive guys in the world, having coached sports for a long time,” said Mr. Johnson, who has coached youth basketball and softball. “But I honestly don’t believe this is the place for that.”

Acknowledging that the changes caused “quite an uproar,” he defended his policy as a way to build skills and camaraderie rather than competition and conflict, and said that it had nothing to do with insurance costs. He said he had seen too many recesses where children “want all the good kids on one side and they want to win at all costs, and kids are made to feel badly.”

Children are still encouraged to move about, he said, and are free to walk the grounds with the school nurse, or depending on the day, sing in the chorus, play chess or pick up litter. And he insisted that children could still play competitive games in their weekly gym classes or in extracurricular programs.

But Ms. Clewell was dismissive of the alternatives. “I’m not having my son pick up trash around the school,” she said. “This is recess.”

For now, the superintendent of schools, David Erwin, has not intervened in the dispute, although he acknowledges that the public outcry has caught his eye.

Connecticut is one of only a handful of states that require some type of break, or recess, but its law does not spell out how long they should be or what pupils should be doing. Because of the free hand that schools have across the country, some pinch minutes once used for recess to prepare students for standardized tests. Others, citing liability concerns, have banned sports like dodgeball, where children are the targets.

In Cheyenne, Wyo., one school has banished tag from the playground as being too rough but allows other contact sports, like touch football. Several schools in Colorado have banned tag for the same reason.

Oh, there is more to read, and you want to read it all. An here's the link to the latest research on recess.

A few years back there was an animated show on Saturday morning TV-- back when there still was Saturday morning TV for kids-- called Recess in which the balls actually were controlled by a troll like creature wearing support hose and an attitude. It was a funny take on the elementary school hierarchy. It looks like this primcipal, after putting away the patchouli and cutting off his ponytail to take his place in the working-week, saw that show, missed the satire, and thought it was actually a good idea.

Let's hope he never reads "A Modest Proposal" by Jonathan Swift-- and if he does, I wouldn't have lunch at his house any time soon.

So many kids today are hopelessly out-of-shape, malnourished, micromanaged, and overscheduled. So many kids do not know how to solve their own problems without running to mommy or the teacher. I mean-- walking around the school yard with the school nurse? Is that lest they stub their widdow toes? And of course, part of the problem is that some parents want to build protective cocoons around their offspring and don't encourage the development of any independence-- and, by the way, failing to supervise kids is not the same thing as allowing them to "be bored." Then there are those parents who threaten a lawsuit any time a kid gets a boo-boo at school.

The world is a competitive place. Yes, absolutely, all manner of sins are often excused by that mantra, too. I know it. Nonetheless, with proper supervision, a game of kickball shouldn't hurt anyone. Yes, I know some people have horror stories to tell about how recess scarred them forever. However, for the vast majority of us, unstructured play time taught us self-reliance and problem-solving, got our hearts pumping, and gave us something to look forward to after lunch, not to mention helping us to be more focused for the rest of the afternoon classes. It's no wonder that adult kickball and dodgeball leagues have started up around the country. The there's paintball, which doesn't seem to be dying off but is actually used by corporations as a "team-building" activity. Competitive sports teach strategy. Competitive sports teach resilience. And games organized by kids give them a sense of real responsibility for themselves instead of expecting the adults in their lives, and in particular teachers, to make sure they are constantly entertained.

Come to think of it, the point in my life when I got too busy for unstructured recreational time was the point in my life I went from being a string bean to something that influences the tides. So, listen, Mr. Johnson, take a deep breath, and let the kids go out and play.

Idiot of the day report

Apparently common sense isn't a requirement to get into Yale, these days. Get a load of this one:

Three Yale University students, including a Briton and a Greek national, have been charged in a case involving the burning of a U.S. flag outside a Connecticut house, a court official said on Wednesday.

Said Hyder Akbar, 23, Nikolaos Angelopoulos, 19, and Farhad Anklesaria, 19, were arrested on Tuesday and charged in New Haven Superior Court with reckless endangerment, arson, breach of peace, criminal mischief and other offenses.

Police said the three torched a flag hanging from the porch of a house in New Haven near the Ivy League school.

Anklesaria is British and Angelopoulos is Greek. Both are freshmen. Akbar, a senior, was born in Pakistan but is a U.S. citizen, according to police and court documents. Anklesaria and Angelopoulos turned over their passports.

They later appeared in court in leg irons and handcuffs, which is really a bit over the top for the idiotic thing they did. They set a flag that was someone else's property on fire. They also set it on fire while it was attached to someone else's house.

What a bunch of morons! They are lucky the homeowner didn't come out to protect his property, and they are lucky they did not set the house on fire.

And, honestly, I'm not too sure I am thrilled with the idea of these guys enjoying the hospitality of my country as guests and then burning the flag either. I am sure I have several students who have more common sense who received rejection letters this week postmarked "New Haven, CT."

Okay, now I believe in freedom of speech. I do. I personally would be irritated and even angry about someone burning a US flag in my presence, but American citizens have a right to do it. As long as they are ready to hear some angry speech right back at them while they do it.

However!

If someone comes up and burns MY flag hanging on the side of my very flammable HOUSE that is filled with my very precious children, dogs, and belongings, then baby, you'd better be ready to find out if this fat lady can catch you.

I bet I could.

You know who you are, idiot driver

Yeah, you.

The man in the Lexus reading the newspaper while driving. I came upon you as we were in the right turn lane this morning. You were stopped even though the light was green, and it took you a couple of minutes to move. I was trying to be in a Zen place on my way to a thirteen hour workday and didn't honk.

Then I pulled up beside you after you FINALLY woke up, turned the corner, and chose a stupid lane after a quarter mile of weaving back and forth. To see a newspaper business section propped up on your steering wheel as you go ten miles under the speed limit down the road.

You are a moron.

This is now two brushes with-- Lexuses? Lexi?-- under the command of a dope. I sense a pattern here. At least there wasn't an ice storm too.

The state legislatures are wild: Utah bill attempts to cast doubt on evolution

Utah state senator Chris Buttars failed in his attempt to pass a bill which would have required students to be told that Darwinian theory is not "empirically proven."

The bill's sponsor, Republican state Sen. Chris Buttars, had said it was time to rein in teachers who were teaching that man descended from apes and rattling the faith of students. The Senate earlier passed the measure 16-12.

But the bill failed in the House on a 28-46 vote Monday. The bill would have required teachers to tell students that evolution is not a fact and the state doesn't endorse the theory.

Rep. Scott Wyatt, a Republican, said he feared passing the bill would force the state to then address hundreds of other scientific theories -- "from Quantum physics to Freud" -- in the same manner.

"I don't believe that anybody in there really wants their kids to be taught that their great-grandfather was an ape," Buttars said.

I dunno, one of my great-grandfathers did have a rather heavy brow, but I was told his laugh was more like a donkey than an actual ape....

Academic freedom in Arizona

An Arizona state senator has introduced a bill in the Arizona legislature to allow college students students to refuse any assignment which they find morally offensive and would require teachers to provide alternatives.

Senate Bill 1331, introduced by Sen. Thayer Verschoor, R-Gilbert, would allow students from universities and community colleges to reject assignments they find objectionable to their religious, moral or sexual beliefs without financial or academic penalty.

The bill passed the Higher Education Committee on Feb. 15. If it passes the Rules Committee and the rest of the Legislature, teachers will have to provide an alternative assignment at a student's request.

"This legislation would impoverish the higher-education system for students," said Barbara Fahey, a professor of English at Scottsdale Community College.

A student complained about an assignment in an English class to read The Ice Storm, which includes scenes of spouse-swapping and other sexual content.

The whole thing started when a student complained that the book was offensive and wanted an alternative assignment. When the teacher refused, the college offered placement in another class. The student refused this and contacted State Senator Verschoor, who then produced the bill. It was pointed out that the syllabus for the course clearly stated that some material could be adjudged objectionable and reminded students that they could drop the class if they so chose.

How long would it take some of MY students to object immediately to every assignment I put before them? And further, who is this student to be able to have such pull with a state senator? I could use his help with a few matters....

Sigh. Some people just make me shake my head

I discovered this little gem while I was reading my October 2005 issue of NEA Today magazine in the "Talkback" section:

Zero Inspiration
Ignorance they say is bliss, but that is no excuse to take it out on students because of your antiquated, outdated rules on giving a zero. ("Talkback," September) Every time you give a zero, you skew the results negatively. To stop the skewing because of a large difference between a 64 (a D-grade) and 0 you should never give a grade lower than 10 points below your lowest passing grade (say, a 55). With that, the student can work to improve his numerical grade and that equates to "fairness." Russell Cadman, Union Gap, Washington

Wow. Where to begin? There's so much there with which to amuse oneself.

First, Russell, let me say that your use of punctuation and mathematics indicates that you were one of those-- cough-- 55 percenters in these two fields. How lovely that you are inflicting your ignorance upon a helpless generation a member of my profession.

Second, let's examine a hypothetical situation.

Student X does no work during most of the semester, for which he receives a 55% in Russell's class. He turns in 3 assignments in the last week of the term, thus making his final grade a 70- a C.

Student Y has difficulty in the subject at hand, but he busts his hump, staying up late at night, going to tutoring after school and so on. Sometimes he earns a 60%, sometimes he earns an 80%. At the end of the semester, he has earned a 70%- a C.

Student Z has great mastery of the subject, works diligently, and earns a grade of 100%-- an A. (Student Z could take over for the teacher on days he is absent.)

So here are a few questions for you, Russell:

1) Would you want Student X wiring your house, collecting your garbage, teaching your children, or performing surgery upon you?

2) How does it feel to make students Y and Z feel like the stupid ones in this scenario? Have YOU succeeded (I assume that your numbers racket will eventually be justified as a quest for self-esteem) in whatever it was you wanted to accomplish here?

3) Student X did 15% of the work and got the same grade as student Y, who showed mastery of 70% of the material. Why should student Y drive himself or deprive himself from pleasure-seeking for the same result as student X?

4) Does everybody get 55% added to their grades, or is it just the lazy? If so, how do you still base your grades on a 100 point scale?

5) Does anyone pay attention or even bother to show up to your classes most of the time? Do you actually care if anybody learns anything?

6) Why are you in a classroom, Russell? What is your purpose? Please think long and hard about this before you waste another minute of another student's time.

F has a range of 59% in most grading systems because we want people who "pass" to demonstrate that they have learned a majority of the material-- even a supermajority. It's not just to be mean.