A Shrewdness of Apes

An Okie teacher banished to the Midwest. "Education is not the filling a bucket but the lighting of a fire."-- William Butler Yeats

Sunday, November 09, 2008

As the deviated septum vibrates.....

As I listen to the dulcet tones of the Man-Who-Doesn't-Snore-I-Don't-Have-A-Problem sawing away over there in the lounger and contemplate the very real possibility that I will get about two hours less of sleep than I need tonight due to the disharmonious sound of a dry squeegee rattling across glass that emits from my beloved's gaping maw, I just wanna say:

Does anyone else out there feel me?

Can I get an "Amen, sistah!" from the legions of bleary eyed former gamines who now resemble a hag straight outta Grimm's due to lack of shut-eye due to the not-so-quiet-riot that we nightly negotiate?

Crap. Well, at least I bought a couple of new books this weekend.



At 11/9/08, 11:00 PM, Blogger mathmom said...

After many years of sharing your pain, my man is actually headed for surgery next month for his deviated septum and other assorted re-arrangements of his breathing apparatus. (Sadly, there's no guarantee that the surgery will help with the snoring, but it usually does, and it should at least improve the quality of his breathing.)

Would he consider a sleep study? He may have sleep apnea.

Good luck!

At 11/10/08, 12:14 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

DH and I have both had issues... and he had the surgery (and snores more now, funny thing) and I didn't but I did the sleep study.

What has made the most difference is a new pillow... particularly one that is firm but only of medium height, as in, kinda flat. Consider buying your SO a new pillow! $20 investment and you might get a bit more sleep!

At 11/10/08, 12:23 AM, Blogger Mei said...

I went on vacation with my mom and didn't get any sleep due to her snoring. Man, I went from cheerful and carefree to snappy and snarly in less than two days.

When I got home I slept for 14 hours STRAIGHT.

So ... yeah. I feel ya.

At 11/10/08, 8:30 AM, Blogger Goldie said...

Mr. Goldie snores, in my son's words, "like a wildebeest". Our solution? An unpopular one. Separate bedrooms. We're on wildly different schedules anyway (I get up at 5:30, he gets up at 8:30 and goes to bed at 2AM, sleeps till noon on weekends) so it works well.
Vacations are a challenge, but we're usually so pooped from running and swimming and all-around vacationing, that we can sleep right through his snoring.

At 11/10/08, 8:36 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

James and I both snore.

I, however, can sleep through anything and he is constantly shaking me awake in attempts to turn me over, which will a) stop my snoring for a bit and b) at least direct the snoring to the wall instead of his head should I happen to snore again.

He claims the snoring has gotten worse during my pregnancy. He's taken to heading to bed 15 minutes before me in the hopes that he'll be snoring first and won't hear me should I chime in.

Lucky him, I'm only at 13 weeks!

Oh, and the ONE night I shook him awake to stop HIS snoring?

He got pissed off, grabbed his pillows and a blanket, and stormed off to the guest room!

At 11/10/08, 10:49 AM, Blogger Mrs. Chili said...

I'm actually having the opposite problem. Mr. Chili is away for the month, and the bed's too big without him. Sigh.

Hey, do you know who's hosting the Carnival? I've got a post I'd like to enter...

At 11/10/08, 5:07 PM, Blogger "Ms. Cornelius" said...

Well, when we did adjourn to the bedroom, he did snore-- like a wildebeest, I like that-- and in my exhaustion I did get pissed and stomped off to the couch resentfully, where after I finished stewing and fuming I probably got 4 and half hours of shut-eye, interrupted by the fear that I would oversleep.

So he emailed me that he has finally made an appointment with the Dr. However, we know his septum is more deviated than two twins who would sleep with Hugh Hefner-- or is that deviant? I get them mixed up--- so who know and it's not for six weeks in which time I may become either a widow or a resident of a nearby hotel.

Mathmom, someone else suggested the sleep study thing today, and I could probably benefit too with as fragile as my sleep patterns are....

anon--Totally willing to try the pillow thing. It's probably too thin for me to suffocate him with, too, so that raises his chances of survival, long-term.

mei--Now my mother-- she snored AND had apnea. When we went to Europe, I would jolt awake every time she stopped breathing. It was nerve wracking. Poor you! At least mine keeps breathing-- at least for now (insert evil laugh here).

goldie-- we do not have any spare bedrooms, sadly, and at least the couch is new and pretty comfy, but it IS a couch. What chafes me is when he asks me why am I so tired....

leesepea-- pregnant ladies may snore at will and must be given a free ride for this. Snore away now so you won't be tired later. You are also owed all the back, leg, neck, forehead and foot massages you want-- it's all in the rule book.

mrs. chili, I have NO IDEA who is hosting the carnival. Have you tried googling blogcarnival?

At 11/10/08, 5:24 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

My normally intelligent hubby insists he doesn't snore! After 35 years of never-enough-sleep, I tried Ambien CR and it has been a blessing. I don't have any of the weird side effects some have, so I continue to use it. I get 7 blissful hours of sleep and don't hear the snores that used to keep my awake till the wee small hours.

At 11/10/08, 6:12 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm totally with you! My colleague and I were discussing it today. She recommended half of a Tylenol PM. I'm so desperate I'm ready to try it. My question: why is it HE snores, and I'm the one sleeping on the couch? My revenge: I leave my alarm clock on, so it wakes him up so he comes out to wake me up.

At 11/10/08, 6:38 PM, Blogger "Ms. Cornelius" said...

Ambien I might try. I am now up to three Tylenol PMs, so that's not good.

At 11/10/08, 7:47 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

My husband doesn't snore...he TWITCHES!!

You know that startle reflex that babies have? The one they're supposed to outgrow at something like 2-3 months? The one that can wake them up when they're sleeping? Apparently, some babies don't outgrow it until, what? age 50? 60?

My husband is 48 and startles like a newborn while he's sleeping. Thing is, it doesn't wake *him* It wakes *me* If it weren't for the fact that he doesn't wake or even seem bothered by it, I'd give him the television-based diagnosis of RLS.

I married a literal nervous wreck.

At 11/10/08, 8:34 PM, Blogger "Ms. Cornelius" said...

Mine did that a couple of months ago, and I nearly had a coronary. I can't imagine having that happen all the time. The snoring-- she is more than enough....

At 11/10/08, 9:56 PM, Blogger Dan Edwards said...

CPAP machine (for breathing control), lose weight, sound machine, one of those Select Comfort airbeds, the ones where you adjust the firmness/hardness. Mrs Polski sleeps better much of the time now. (I have the CPAP and have lost weight, she has the sound machine and we share the air bed....her side much more firm than mine.)

Good luck.

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