Can You Hear Me Now?????

Hallelujah!!! I got my latest cell phone bill, and this is the most incredible thing that I have ever posted, but I swear that it's true: My latest bill was $1.90 BELOW the amount to which I agreed in the contract. Including tax. $37.05 instead of $39.95. I swear.

Sorry, Fred, but it's true. I used to have the guys that constantly chant "Can you hear me now?" but they didn't hear me when I complained about a coverage hole right over my house. Before that, I had the guys who "Never stop working for you," but apparently they only worked for me when they could figure out how to triple the charges. I also was the victim of an advantage, which ended up being Singularly expensive when I received a $380 bill right before Christmas for roaming after a trip to Chicago, even though my plan had no roaming charges. After 5 hours on the phone and speaking to 19 different alleged oxymoronic "customer service" reps, I finally got one who would agree to give me my money back-- after 10 days more waiting. By the way, the last guy to whom I spoke, Mr. Honesty, told me to NEVER, NEVER, NEVER do autopay for your cell phone bill, since you'll never see your money back in a dispute.

See, I knew Joan Cusack could never lie to you. Anyone who can play the girl in the brace (Geek Girl #1) in Sixteen Candles to Marcella in Grosse Pointe Blank to Jessie the Singing Cowgirl in Toy Story can get me to part with my hard-earned greenbacks.