Skwirls Gone Wild at School

Get a load of this one-- a San Jose elementary school was locked down after a nut-crazed rodent attacked three people:

A child and two adults were hurt when a squirrel went nuts and attacked them after wandering into a San Jose elementary school classroom on Wednesday.

The door to a first grade classroom at Evergreen Elementary, located at 3010 Fowler Road, was left open when the squirrel scampered in about 9 a.m., according to school officials. The squirrel entered as students and chaperones were preparing to depart for a field trip.

An 11-year-old girl was bitten twice on the arm. Then, the squirrel went after a couple of adults in the room -- severely biting one of them on the upper arm and drawing blood, according to San Jose police Sgt. Nick Muyo.

Something must be done about that furry little freak.

You can even see video if you go to the link. It's time we expose the secret skwirl conspiracy to eat the human race out of birdseed. Everyone likes to think that they are Disney-fied little furry friends, kind of tree-climbing Bichon Frises. I am here to tell you, people, they are natural born sociopaths bent on mayhem and the purloining of twinkies from dormitory rooms they then attempt to destroy with their razor-like claws during finals week, not that I have any personal experience about which bitterness yet lingers....

Save Our Schools from the Skwirl Menace!